My Mother Is On Facebook

"You are not serious!" I heard one of my female offspring shout, followed by "Mooooooooom!" I ran into the office sure I would see blood or a body part laying on the floor, and instead I found my daughter sitting there staring at me with this horrified look on her face. "OMG. No! Tell me you did not send me an invitation to be your friend on facebook."

For those of you who don't know what facebook is, it's sort of like a online social gathering spot. Think of it as gathering around the water cooler at work, or when the farmers gather at the coffee shop early in the morning. You can leave each other messages and send pictures and lots of different activities and applications are available to spruce up your page. A friend of mine convinced me to start my own page a while back, and I thought my girls would want to be my friend as much as I would want to be theirs. Guess I was wrong...well, with one of them anyhow.

This was one of those times when I said the first thing that came to my mind, and would later regret: "Sure I sent it. Why? Don't you want to be my friend?" She just continued to look at me as if I had grown a third eye and said "You're kidding right? I can't be your friend. You're my MOTHER for crying out loud!" I looked back at her confused and said "So what. We can still be friends can't we?" "NOOOOOOOO! Eeewwww! That's just wierd. People will think I'm some sort of freak if I have my mom as one of my friends. Nothing personal mom, but it just isn't going to happen."

I could have thought back to when I was that age. To remember back to how uncool it would have been for my mom to go to the roller skating rink with me and my friends, or how embarrassed I would have been for her to ride bikes around town with me. Instead I took offense to what she said. I'm cool....aren't I? I mean, I have my hair and clothes in current styles. I don't drive a soccer mom vehicle anymore (sorry soccer moms...you're turn to return to coolness will come again), and most importantly I know that you call a tatoo a "tat". I even like some of the current dance songs and can sing along with them (apple bottom jeans, boots with the fur......) Yep, I'm cool! So why wouldn't someone want to be my friend? I'm sure I am much cooler than my mom was when I was 18 (sorry mom, no offense).

A cool mom doesn't harass her daughter or personally guilt her into letting her be added to her friend list by reminding her how horribly painful her birth and delivery were. No, cool moms are too...well, too cool for that. Instead I stalk her like some sort of puma stalking it's prey. I set the stage. She accidentally left her page open on the computer so I see what friends she has.....ooooooh, she has one of my sisters as her friend, and her twin sister who has already let me be her friend. Oh and there's a few more people we have in common. SCORE! From that point on, any time we'd see one of those people I would mention how they were on her friend list as well as mine, but that she wouldn't let me be her friend. They of course would say things like "Really? Why not?" And she would roll her eyes at me. Guilt can be a wonderful weapon when stalking your prey and if used correctly.

Finally the day arrived. The day she actually said that if I sent her another invitation, she'd accept it and we'd be facebook friends. Ok, actually what she said was "If I agree to this, will you stop hounding me?" "Yes" I said, all giddy with excitement. "Will you promise to never post to me on there?" "Yes" I was dancing around like I had to go to the bathroom. Do you promise not to comment to anyone else on there?" "Yes"....still giddy. "Ok. *sigh* I'll accept it. Just please don't do anything to embarrass me." "You mean like posting the picture of me in just my underwear?" I asked. "OMG Mooooooooom! You promised!" "hehehe, just kidding. I'll be good". She added one more requirement for me to be accepted: I had to promise to never ever send or accept an invitation to be friends with one of her school friends. I promised, but had my fingers crossed. Hey, if one of those kids wants to be friends with me, am I supposed to ignore their desire? Puu-lease!

So I was accepted. Not sure what that means since I don't talk to her on there. It's ok though, I don't need to. We're now facebook buddies, so it's all good.

So as all us cool moms say "Keep it real my peeps". ooooooo. I should post that to her. I'm sure she'd love it, no matter what she tries to tell me!