Hair today gone tomorrow

Ladies, remember your first time shaving your legs? I was 11, or was it 12? I dunno. But I do remember being sooooo excited. To me, that meant I was a woman. No more little girl for me, no way. I now shaved my legs, call me ma'am. The very first razor I ever used was an electric razor. I don't remember the brand, but it was pink like this one on the right. I thought it was so cool. I used it for a while and then found out, electric razors were for "babies". Well, if I'm a woman now, I can't be using one of those. Time to move up to a real razor. One with blades...sharp blades. I'm not known for my patience, so razors and I have never gotten along well together. I have many scars on my legs from where I removed a hunk of skin ~ remember how gross it was to see that flap of skin hanging from your razor? ~ And I've done it several times. I learned to go slower and that worked much better. Although I did often wonder if I took enough hunks of skin, would that also remove the roots of the hairs and therefore I'd never have to shave again.

Then along came an invention so great we were told it would revolutionize shaving forever. It would remove us from the daily, bi-weekly, or weekly task of shaving. This invention would leave us with smooth bare legs for weeks...up to a month. Imagine men...not having to shave your face for an entire month. You can see the appeal. You can sense our excitment. Especially since our legs are a lot bigger of an area than your head (well, except for that one guy who lives in town, but he's the exception). This invention was called "Epilady". I can remember buying my Epilady. I was almost giddy with excitement. I couldn't hardly wait to get home to use it. I plugged it in and turned it on. The hum of the motor was soft and soothing. Just like the package promised...this was going to be a relaxing experience. I laid the epilady against my skin. "Ouch!" "Ouch!" "Dang!" "What the *&%#?" I turned it off and wiped away a tear. Ok, I HAD to be doing something wrong. This hurt so bad that it took my breath away! I re-read the instructions. Ok, maybe I didn't lay it exactly flat against my skin. That was it. Let's try this again... "OWWWW!" "For the love of Pete!" What kind of sadist developed this thing? It literally RIPS the hairs out of your legs. And it does it with no mercy at all. I would rather have legs that look like this poor womans legs than to endure that torture device any longer. Ok, there HAS to be a better way.

I tried Nair & Neet. You know, the lotions that you wipe on and then wipe off. Those did work, and they worked great. But usually my family passed out from the smell, and that's not a good thing. Oh and one time my dog licked my leg and puked for hours. Again, not a good thing. Waxing came along. I tried it once myself, but holy moly, I'm just not into self-inflicted pain...on purpose anyhow. So that was out. Maybe I should just be au-natural. Some women do it and they are totally fine with it. It's the norm in France and maybe some other places as well. Why not here? Men have the right to shave or not to shave and it's all good. But let a woman get a little bit of stubble on her legs and a man who touches them will act like they have just slid their hand down a razor blade. It's just not fair. But then again is the fact of life. They don't have to shave, deal with periods, PMS, labor, delivery, and all other maladies of womanhood. It's just not fair.