I Shall Be Dazzling

Over the years family and friends have passed along the info that my cooking abilities are uh, shall we say not quite Martha-esque. They think I don't know, but oh....I know.

Jay's family gets together for Easter, and while some are asked to bring wonderful, almost gourmet dishes, I am assigned veggie & fruit trays.Nothing says "We think that even you can't screw this up" like asking you to bring those.

"Aunt Nell, how about if you bring your Crab Stuffed Mushrooms?"

"Cousin Sara, will you please bless us with one or two of your wonderful apple or cherry pies?"

"Dena, can you tear open a bag of baby carrots?"

But this year, I shall redeem myself. So what if just last night I burned some chocolate chip cookies I tried to make.

So what if I forgot to spray the crockpot the other night and the meatballs I had in there got over-cooked and stuck to the crock part of the pot.

So what if somehow instead of making a wonderful loaf of bread recently , I made a door stop that even our dog didn't want anything to do with (and trust me - he eats anything!).

So what if instead of waiting for the timer to go off, my family waits for the smoke alarm to go off to know suppers ready.

I shall redeem myself.

Or totally embarrass myself.

We'll see how it goes.

I have been looking through websites. I have seen pictures. Pictures of things people do with their fruit and veggies.

Ok, wait...that doesn't sound right.

Ways people arrange their baby carrots.

Much better.

It's almost like bedazzling. Except for with food.

Speaking of bedazzling, did any of you notice the uber-bedazzled microphones they had on the American Country Music Awards the other night? Can someone give me a "WOW"!

So for this weekend, I shall bedazzle me some watermelon. I shall bedazzle me some grapes. I shall bedazzle me some asparagus.

And the family shall look at it and they will be dazzled. And I shall be hailed as the most Martha-esque one of us all.

Either that, or next year I'll be asked to bring bottles of water.