Prayer Request For Lance

I'm sending out a prayer request today for my son-in-law, Marine Corporal Lance Jones.









Lance is being deployed early this morning to Afghanistan. As of right now, we are being told he will be there until sometime in December and then will be sent to Japan until next Spring.

We pray that God will protect him and all soldiers fighting on our behalf. Please keep them safe from harm and bring them home quickly.

We also ask for prayers for our Ashley. She has had to learn very quickly what it means to be a military wife, and while the past several days have been very hard enough for her, the next year will be equally hard. I'm so glad she has her faith and all her family to help give her the strength and support she'll need.




Almighty and eternal God,
those who take refuge in you will be glad and forever will shout for joy. Protect these soldiers as they discharge their duties. Protect them with the shield of your strength and keep them safe from all evil and harm. May the power of your love enable them to return home in safety, that with all who love them, they may ever praise you for your loving care. We ask this through Jesus Christ our Lord. 

Amen

Have A Little Faith

FAITH: Pronunciation: \ˈfāth\

Function: noun

Etymology: Middle English feith, from Anglo-French feid, fei, from Latin fides; akin to Latin fidere to trust

Date: 13th century

1 a : belief and trust in and loyalty to God (2) : belief in the traditional doctrines of a religion b (1) : firm belief in something for which there is no proof (2) : complete trust


Complete trust - that's the one I have trouble with. It's hard for me to trust things which I have no control over. Well, not everything - for example...

I have no control over how diet coke is made, and I'm ok with that.

I have no control over the fact that there are no purple m&ms (the ones at Easter time don't count), and even though I think they'd be adorable, I'm ok with it.

I have control over over the tvs in our home, because I live with 2 guys and therefore am outnumbered (thanks again girls for growing up and moving out...sheesh). But I have given up trying, and I am ok with it.

But when it comes to things that really matter to me, that's when I have a problem. For example, today my Ashley is on a plane - well actually, she'll be on 3 planes on her way to Honolulu, Hawaii.

Ashley's boyfriend "L" of almost a year is a Marine and is currently doing desert training there. The poor guys are near the mouth of a volcano for many hours every day doing the training, so they can try to get used to enduring the incredible heat...can you imagine??

They just recently got word that they were going to get a 4 day break - Today, through Sunday. The only rules are they have to sleep on base, and they are not allowed to leave the island (even for day trips). He called Ashley right away and offered to pay her way to come down there, if she'd come spend that time with him.

He will have a 2 week leave in April, and he'll be back in Iowa for that, but obviously his family will have first rights to his time and attention, as it should be. So Ashley & L knew their time together would be limited on that trip. After that leave, he is leaving for Afghanistan for 18 mo.

They both agreed that these 4 days would be the only real alone time they would have together before he leaves, so they made the decision that she'd fly down there.

Some have said "Alone on a tropical island...asking for trouble!", but I know my daughter. She's a great girl with a good head on her shoulders, and wonderful morals and values to go along with that. Some have said "But they've only been going out a short time. They can't really be THAT serious." To them I say "Jay & I were engaged after 3 mo, and married within 10 mo, so yea, I do believe they can be serious in 10 months time."

One thing I know for sure is that I completely trust her.

What I don't trust is the airline pilots and the planes. Honestly, THAT is what I have the trust issues with. When you read lately about pilots falling asleep, and pilots surfing the web, and pilots doing drugs, I have major trust issues when they are dealing with "cargo" very precious to me!

Plus, I have severe panic attacks when it comes to the thought of flying, so I also have issues with the thought of the plane getting off the ground, flying properly, and landing safely.

Belief and trust in and loyalty to God - And because I have a hard time trusting those things, I pray, and I have belief that my prayers will be answered. Today I pray, and pray, and pray. I pray for each leg of her journey. Right now she is somewhere between Minneapolis and San Francisco, and I pray the mountains are bending down low....limbo low. Next I'll be praying that the waters between there and Hawaii are very calm today - no wind at all. Just blue sky and no clouds. I'll be praying for the same things when she flies back to Iowa on Monday.

Please dear Jesus, watch over the pilots and give them steady hands and sharp minds to guide the planes. Please protect Ashley from harm, and allow her to have the best time ever during her time with "L". I pray that they have the wonderful, memory creating, close time they are both praying for. May it be enough to sustain their hearts over the next few months until they can see each other again....and on into their extended time apart. Amen

New Perspective On The Military

My brother was in the military, we have friends who were and are in the military. I have always prayed for them and prayed for their safe return, but honestly...except for my brother, I was able to go about my day without much worrying.

To be extra honest, a part of me is happy to know that due to my son's asthma and hypoglycemia, he'll never be accepted into the military, so I'll never have to know personally how it feels to be a mother with a child enlisted.

Don't get my wrong, I am so proud of all the men and women who are protecting and defending me and my family, but I don't know if I could handle it as a mom. Maybe I could, but I'd rather not find out. Bad...I know.

However, I am almost as close as I'd want to be in regards to that. Ashley has a boyfriend who is a year older than she is. He is a marine, and he was been stationed in Japan until next February. After that, he will probably go to Afghanistan.

We have known this young man for several years...since our girls were freshmen in high school. He showed at the state fair, which is how we met him. He had a crush on one of them (or maybe both?) and would tease them and pick on them the way young boys do when they like a girl.

We knew this young man before his voice changed. We knew him when he was still short and scrawny. We've watched him grow up and mature. He came to us a year ago and apologized for any inappropriate or rude things he did when he was younger. His comment was "I was kind of a jerk as a young kid and I appreciate you always being nice to me when I probably didn't deserve it." Wow! We were impressed by that.

We didn't know until about a month ago that he and Ashley started dating last Summer while he was home on leave for a while. She feels so comfortable with him and said he's the first guy to respect her morals and to appreciate her for having them.

I "talk" to him sometimes on Facebook. She talks to him daily when he's able to have a cell phone or as often as possible.

Last Tuesday there was a bombing in the Philippines, and they believe it was the work of Islamic Terrorists. We knew that last Tuesday the boyfriend flew for a month to the Philippines. We heard that there was a soldier from Iowa who was killed in the bombing. I can't explain the knot in my stomach until I talked to Ashley to find that no, it was not him. His plane didn't arrive until several hours after the bombing.

Thank you God.

And to all you moms who have children who are serving....I have only had a taste of what you go through day after day. God bless you all.

I Can't Imagine

Ashley called me this evening and said "Hey mom, make sure you watch the news tonight. My school is gonna be on it because of an attempted abduction."

It wasn't her university she was referring to, but the elementary school she works at every day. She is an after school assistant in the kindergarten/first grade room. When she got to work today she and the other assistants were called into a brief meeting and they were told what happened.

Apparently some guy in his 20's approached an 8 yr old boy and asked if he wanted a ride. When the boy said no, the man asked if he wanted candy. The boy took off running and told his parents when he got home.

How scary for that boy! Don't you just want to give him a big hug?

I just can't imagine living in a city. The other night when Austin had Homecoming, I made him call me after he dropped his date off at her house. That way I knew he was on his way home and was safe. I waited as patiently as I could for him to make the 10-15 min drive home before I could relax.

I just can't imagine having my child walking alone each day. I realize sometimes it's necessary, and I'm not judging anyone....I'm just trying to imagine how hard that would have to be to make that decision.

I also can't imagine having such a sick outlook as to have no value on human life...especially that of a child. To even think of attempting to kidnap a child for whatever reason is just beyond my comprehension.

And of course with my 19 yr old daughter having been mistaken for a junior high age girl several times in recent months, just knowing she has to walk across a parking lot to her car as the days get shorter and shorter makes me pray harder and harder.

How I Met Mr. Right ~ Part 2

For our first date, Jay called me and said his cousin was having a party for her birthday and he wanted to know if I'd go with him. My response was "Sure, why not." We got to the party and it was then that I found out his cousin was turing 9 (Happy birthday again Suzi) and his entire extended family was at this party. Talk about pressure! My first reaction was "LAME". But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that it showed how important family was to him and that impressed me.

For the second date, Jay brought a big pizza to my place and we stayed in talking all night to get to know each other. Jay told me he was a student at Iowa State. When I asked his major, he said he was a business major with an emphasis in finance.

Ca-ching!! I had found my city guy, which is what I had wanted!!

What he forgot to mention was that his full major was AG business with an emphasis in FARM finance and that his plans were to go back home and farm when he was done. It's a good thing I didn't know that, because I would have never gone out with him again. Dating a farmer was NOT in my plans.

He took me home to meet his parents and that just about ended everything. This was in October. For this non-farming girl that meant nothing. But I now know that meant it was harvest season. I was going to meet his parents. I wanted to make a good impression, so I wore black dress pants, a nice shirt, boots and a white coat. We drove to his parents home and his mom was there and she sweetly offered me a pair of coveralls to put over my clothes. They aren't exactly flattering and I knew I would rather burn the clothes I was wearing than put a pair of those on, so I politely declined.

We leave the house and head to a farm field. Jay leads me over to a tractor and we ride out to the middle of a field where I meet his dad. They had a new implement so Jay left me in the tractor while he rode with his dad for a bit to learn about the new equipment. I sat there thinking "ok girl. Let's evaluate this situation. You are sitting in a tractor. A T-R-A-C-T-O-R." Not exactly part of our 5 year plan now is it?" The song "If They Could See Me Now" kept going through my head. I prayed and said "Dear God, I need a sign from you. Is this the guy you would have imagined for me? Remember, I'm trying to find my Mr. Right."

The very next day when I got off work I found a note under the windshield wiper of my car. It was from Jay. I won't go into all that it said, but the main part said "I'm sure I'm not what you may have thought of when you imagined your dream man. I don't have fancy things or drive fancy cars or live in a big fancy city, but I'm a man who loves you and would love the chance to prove to you that I am your Mr. Right."

That freaked me out! I had never told him about my prayer or my wish to find my Mr. Right!

We spent almost all of our free time together everyday. By the end of the second month of dating we knew we had something special....but it was about to be tested....He had yet to meet my parents ~ specifically, my dad. I love my dad, but when it comes to his daughters dating, he can weed them out pretty fast. :)


to be continued...

How I Met Mr. Right

Our 22nd anniversary is coming up soon, and I started thinking back on when I first started dating Jay. Let me take you all the way back to New Years Eve 1985 when I had just turned 22 years old.

A group of friends and I went to a nightclub. We reserved a table at the club the New Years Party. I had my big 80's hair going on and I wore a cute knitted dress that of course fell off one shoulder. My hair was up in a bright red banana clip and I had sprayed sparkles in my hair. My red lipstick matched perfectly to my red hoop earrings, bangle bracelets, and my red pumps.

I excused myself to the restroom at one point and I prayed right there in stall #3 "Please God. Please let me meet Mr. Right tonight. Please!!!"

Midnite came. My friends and I exchanged kisses and hugs. We shook the noise makers and blew into the horns. We raised a glass of the cheap nasty tasting champagne the club provided to each table. In my mind I again said my prayer "Please God. Let me meet Mr. Right tonight."

A few minutes later a guy named Mike asked me to dance. We talked while dancing and he seemed nice, but there was just no chemistry. Before he left Mike handed me his business card. He said he love it if I'd call him sometime. I said I'd think about it and he left. He was nice, but not "Mr. Right" I got frustrated and angry that it appeared God had not listened to my prayers at all.

When I got home I took off my coat and pulled my keys out of my pocket. Out came Mike's business card.

Mr. Mike Wright Investments

Mr. Wright

I laughed out loud. I felt that was Gods sense of humor showing me that he HAD heard my prayer, and in a way had answered it. This WAS Mr. Wright, but not my Mr. Right.

The year progressed like previous years. While waiting at the club one night for more friends to show up, a guy asked me to dance. He made me laugh and I had such a good time with him. After the dance was over he went back to his table with his friends. They were loud and obnoxious I felt that if those were his friends, he was probably just like them, so I mentally told myself to forget about him. Over the next few weeks, I kept my distance because of his loud friends, and I declinded his offers to take me out on a date.

The last Saturday night in August he came to the club and I agreed to go on a date with him. I then realized that after all this time I didn't even know his name.

He introduced himself and said: "My name is Jay."

...to be continued

My Newest Stress Relieving Mantra

God never ends anything on a negative;
God always ends on a positive.
-- Edwin Louis Cole

Pray For The Prodigal Son

I talked on the phone yesterday to a good friend of mine and my heart is breaking for her. She is married and has 2 boys. Her oldest son is almost 21 and has dated the same girl for 5 years and they got engaged this past Valentines Day. They were set to get married in the summer of 2010 when both had graduated from college.

I have no idea what happened, but the young couple broke off their engagement and are no longer in a relationship. It's not that this is new to anyones life. This happens, and if it's going to happen, it's better it happens before the trip down the aisle, no matter how sad it is.

What is almost "bizarre" is how her son appears to be handling things. He's always on the go now, like a ping pong ball. Always wants (or needs) to be doing something. Whether it's biking with a friend, or wanting to go with the buddies on a weekend getaway or spending money on trivial things and he's always been pretty conservative when it comes to money.

Sure that part makes sense. He's hurting. It's easier to keep your mind occupied than to feel the pain. I get that. His mom and dad get that. What they don't get is his treatment of them. They are suddenly like the enemy. She said he lashes out at them for any little thing they say and twists their words and he says they are yelling at him or criticizing him. He says they love his brother much more than they've ever loved him and he doesn't "belong" in their family.

When I talked to her last night she was so upset because he had screamed at them so badly a couple of days earlier and was on what appeared to be a wild irrational tangent - like a 2 yr old having a temper tantrum. He lashed out at not only his parents, but also his brother to whom he's been very close. He left to go back to his apartment and they haven't heard from him since (although one of his roommates assures the parents he is physically fine). He had told his parents he didn't want to be a part of their family, he would never speak to them again, and would never come home again. Since that time he won't answer any of their phone calls.

The poor parents are obviously distraught. They don't know if it's depression over the break-up, if it's drugs or alcohol (however, they really don't believe that's the case due to nothing else has changed - he's still a 4.0 student, has 2 part time jobs, he's very nice looking & careful about his appearance, etc). They don't know what to do, and due to the fact that he's an adult, they can't force him to do anything like counseling.

She asked me to pray for her son. She asked me to pray for her and her husband and their son. This is a good family in crisis, and I ask that you please, please pray for them and their son as well. I pray that Jesus leads him home.

Happy Easter!

He has risen...He has risen indeed!

Sisters And Friends

Sisters is probably the most competitive relationship within the family, but once the sisters are grown, it becomes the strongest relationship. ~Margaret Mead

I've said this before, but I'll say it again - when Ashley & Chelsea were growing up, they fought all the time. Literally...

all the time.

They argued over everything. Literally...

e v e r y t h i n g.

To say it got on my last nerve is an understatement.

It got to the point where most days it made me crazy! I kept praying that someday they would actually get along. I vividly remember my pleading with God to please allow us just one full day with no arguing, but it rarely ever happened. It made me sad to think that here they were not only sisters, but identical twins. Twins who are supposed to have that special bond. Not only did they not acknowledge that they maybe had that bond, but they were quite vocal about how they didn't want a twin, let alone a bond with her. I prayed that somehow, someday they would actually grow to love each other.

Don't get me wrong, they have always been such sweet loving girls to everyone ...just not to each other. And they readily admitted it.

With them now at college, we sadly don't get to see them very often. We talk on the phone as often as their schedules allow, but we had no idea if they talked to each other or not. Given the fact that they never got along, I sadly figured they were glad to be rid of their twin and probably hardly ever talked to her.

Thankfully, I was wrong.

From what we have seen over just these past few days is nothing short of miraculous. Seriously. They have literally gotten so close, it's amazing!

They have all kinds of secrets between them and when one of them mentions some particular word or person, they erupt into giggles. Does it bother me that I have no clue what they are laughing about? Heck no! I love watching them. That might sound corny, but when you figure that most days I never thought we'd see this between them, I really do enjoy it.

Then it was their birthday last Thursday. The cards and facebook messages they exchanged were so sweet. Talking about how they missed each other, and how they wished they could have spent the whole day together.

It made my heart smile.

They exchanged the sweetest "sister" related gifts.

Chelsea sent a bunch of pictures of the two of them in and had them made into a personalized photo album for Ashley, complete with notes included that she had written.



And Ashley gave Chelsea a "sister" related gift and wrote her the sweetest note.

And both of them stated that not only were they sisters, but they were best friends. Did you read that? Not just friends.....they said they were best friends.

Oh my goodness, talk about making their mom cry!

When I went to bed I said a prayer of thanks that they had finally grown into being friends. And speaking as someone who has sisters of her own, it's a blessing they will always be grateful for.

My Most Memorable Valentines Day

With Valentines Day coming, I started thinking back to what would be my most memorable Valentines day that I've had. One in particular didn't involve Jay per-say, so I ignored it and thought some more. But, I kept coming back to that one particular Valentines Day, so I sat and thought long and hard about it. It did have to do with great love, only this was not a love between and man and woman, but between a mother and her children.

This is the story of my most memorable Valentines Day:

We had tried for quite a while to have children. I don't ovulate, and that creates a problem for someone wanting to have children, so we sought out the help of a fertility specialist. Finally after many shots given by doctors, nurses, physician assistants and even by Jay (that's a whole other post in itself), we were blessed with getting pregnant.

My first ultrasound showed I had twins. The next ultrasound I had done showed triplets. One night I miscarried one of the babies and from that point on I was put on bedrest.

Jay was incredible during that time. Our old farmhouse only had one bathroom and it was on the main floor, but our bedroom was upstairs. So he put a mattress on the living room floor right next to the couch for me to sleep on, and he slept on the couch. He could have been upstairs with the whole bed to himself, but instead he willingly slept on that old uncomfortable couch next to me. He bought an office chair with wheels so I could wheel myself to and from the bathroom and also out to the kitchen to get something to eat or drink.

It wasn't long and we learned I had toxemia. I was retaining fluid and it was very noticeable, and I looked swollen.

In January I started weekly doctor visits. By this time I looked larger than someone who is ready to deliver due to the fluid retention, and I was barely 5 months. My blood pressure was going up, up, up and the doctor didn't like what he saw. He said that basically my body is not handling being pregnant with more than one baby.

Valentines day was coming and I begged Jay to take me out to eat somewhere just for that one night to celebrate our last Valentines day alone as a couple. I love good jumbo shrimp and there is a place not far that has the best! He reluctantly agreed and I felt giddy with excitement at the thought we were being so sneaky.

I had a morning doctor appointment on Valentines day and our plan was to go out to eat for lunch (instead of supper) before heading back home. I was still on bedrest, but we had rented a wheelchair to get me to and from appointments, so we just planned to use that, which I felt would be no different than if I were rolling around in the house on my office chair with wheels. Here is the actual insert from a journal I kept while going through our fertility treatments and pregnancy:

****************************

February 14, 1990: Happy Valentines day! Today Jay and I are going to go out for a Valentines day lunch. I know I'm supposed to stay on bedrest, but oh man it has been so long since I was out anywhere except to a doctors appointment.

At my doctors appointment this morning I had an another ultrasound done. Both babies are doing good - praise God! I also had blood drawn for a glucose test and found that I have gestational diabetes. Dr. Bob said that's not all that abnormal in multiple births and it will go away after the babies are born. However due to that and all the swelling I have going on, I'm to monitor my salt intake closely. Guess that means no salt on my eggs huh?

My blood pressure wasn't good today. Sitting down, the reading was 180/96 and laying down it was 182/108. Usually when you check someones blood pressure when laying down it's lower. I don't know if it's because of the pressure I feel with the two babies when I lay down or if that has nothing to do with it, but man is it uncomfortable to lay on my back. One of them is always in my ribs, and the other is always on my bladder, so I can't breathe and I pee all the time.

Dr. Bob didn't like the readings at all and told me he was sending me on a trip - a trip to the hospital to be admitted so they could monitor me closer. I started to cry and said "But Dr. Bob, we were going to sneak me out for some shrimp. Please can I wait a couple of hours to go to the hospital?" He patted my shoulder and said he'd allow Jay to bring me some shrimp. He doesn't get it that the shrimp isn't the important part.

I'm not sure how long I'll be here in the hospital. I'm still not even to that magical number of 30 weeks yet. If something happens this early, I'll definitely have to go to Des Moines to deliver because the have a NICU there and this hospital doesn't. Jay got me all settled in at the hospital and let me have a good cry. He went home to get some things I needed, and when he came back he gave me my Valentines day card and a white teddy bear wearing a pink t-shirt that says "You're Mine". (*which I still have*). He stayed for a while and then he left.

I feel so alone and scared. I know that the high blood pressure isn't a good thing. I know that my protein levels are rising, which also isn't good. I can't imagine going through all this and then not being around to enjoy our babies. Please God take care of me. I'm also scared for my babies. They are so tiny yet and they aren't strong enough to survive. Please allow them to stay strong and healthy inside me for as long as possible God.

I have been crying for a while now and I can't stop. I will probably cry myself to sleep.

****************************
So that is my most memorable Valentines day. Not romantic, but definitely unforgettable....and less than 1 month from that date I had beautiful identical twin daughters.

Champ

Recently I wrote a post about our horses here and I also wrote one specifically about our oldest horse Champ here.

As I had written, he had been battling cancer and we knew our time with him was short. Sadly, Champ died yesterday morning. Having to call Ashley with the news was heartbreaking.

Champ has quite a history which speaks volumes about his perseverance, gentleness and forgiving nature. He was raised by a loving family and when those children grew to be more advanced riders, the family donated Champ to a nearby camp where they knew Champ would be ridden daily. Unfortunately, it was discovered that Champ was being abused and neglected at this camp and the family got him back and worked on nursing him back to health. We happened to hear about them looking for a loving family and Ashley had been begging us for a horse, so we drove 3 hours to take a look.

When we got there, I saw Champ, and there was the youngest child (around 3 years old) running around him, flipping his tail and crawling around underneath him, and Champ just stood there. I knew this was a special horse. We talked with the owners and decided he was the horse we had been looking for. It broke my heart when we left to see the children of the family all standing on their front poor with tears running down their faces, but it assured me that he must be pretty special for them to have loved him this much.

Champ was not a "flashy" horse, and I don't think Ashley was instantly in love with him. But you can't help but fall in love with him, and it didn't take long for that to happen for Ashley. He loved attention and was so patient and gentle. Ashley spent hours in the barn and it wasn't long before we knew they had developed a special bond. She often referred to him as her best friend because she could tell him all her secrets and she knew he'd never repeat them to anyone.

This picture below shows Ashley helping out a little girl. It was the girls first show and she was really struggling with getting her little horse to cooperate. Ashley rode out, and Champ let her slowly side-step close enough so she could get ahold of the reins and help the little girl. That's how patient he was. The little horse was flitting around, but Champ just stood there. Nothing fazed him.

Champs cancer is not something he just got a couple of months go. The vets told us that this is something he's probably had for at least a year or so. I believe God knew how much Champ meant to Ashley. I also believe he knew how much it would mean to her to finish out her 4-H horse showing career with him. She showed him for the last time this past July. In August she moved to college and in September we started noticing him getting weaker. I believe God granted Champ to have the strength to be well long enough for them to have this past Summer together. He knew it would be hard for her to lose him, but at least she would have the memories from that last show. For that we are so grateful.

Enjoy your time at the Bridge ol' boy.
And know that you were very loved.

Letter To Me as a MOP

Missy at It's Almost Naptime asked moms of older children to share some wisdom they have gained through the years. I wasn't named specifically, but since my kids are older, I do qualify. She asked that we write a letter to ourselves answering these specific questions:

What would you say to yourself, when you had pre-schoolers?
What do you wish you knew then, that you know now?

I took some time to think about those questions and jotted down some notes. Here's what I came up with...

Dear Dena,

Wow, crazy days huh? You wanted to be a wife and mother, but never dreamed you'd have 3 kids in 3 years did you? And you never thought how being a farmers wife would would mean that basically you are a single parent for a few months out of each year. Surprise!

I know there are many sleepless nights, and I know there is chaos, but it WILL get easier. There will come a day when you no longer have to change diapers or wipe noses. There will come a day when food will end up only in their mouths instead of their hair, their siblings ear, or any other countless places.

Your daughters won't actually drive you insane, even though you're convinced that most days that's their goal. You are going to see a self-confidence grow in them that will fill you with pride. They are going to be beautiful, but don't worry, they aren't vain and thankfully boys will not be a big priority in their lives.

The constant reminders to say their bedtime prayers will be worth it, more than you know right now. When they move out, you'll get a little tug on your heart when you find they both have packed their bibles in with their photos and other special items they want to take along.

Austin will get potty trained. Don't worry. He really won't have to wear diapers to Kindergarten. He's going to have some major health issues that you'll have to deal with, but he's strong and he'll be fine, so try not to worry too much. He's going to grow into an amazing young man.

To survive all of this I want you to do two things... say a prayer and take a deep breath.

Every morning when you wake up...

Whenever things are getting overwhelming...

When you feel like you want to run away...

When the tears come and you can't get them to stop...

When you are begging for conversation that doesn't include action heroes and purple dinosaurs...

When you doubt your abilities as a "good" mother...

...Say a prayer and take a deep breath.

Treasure this time. Absorb as much into your memory as you can, because these days will end. Believe it or not, you're going to miss the chaos. You're going to miss the noise. You're going to miss the fingerprints on the windows. You're going to miss the look on their face when they go all day without going potty in their pants and they declare themselves a big boy/girl. You're going to miss reading "I think I can and I Love You Forever" 25 times a day, and you're going to miss the silliness that goes along with sweet, simple childhood .

Be ready though to throw on your tough skin, rough days are coming. Puberty will hit and you will no longer be fun to hang out with. And with twin girls, you're going to get a double whammy! Don't take it personally.

If you keep the lines of communication open, and show them your unconditional love, all will be ok. It won't be easy. As Dr. Dobson says "Parenting isn't for wimps". It's also like they say about the Army - it's the toughest job you'll ever love. Your children will say things that will hurt you. They may not mean to, but they will. Love them anyway. The "normal" them will return. Unfortunately, it will be when they are almost grown. But you will find a maturity in them that wasn't there before and you're heart will burst with pride.

To get there, remember to do those two things...say a prayer and take a deep breath.

And when all is said and done, they will go off to college. Your daily job is done, and you will experience a pain and heartache as you have never known before. You will cry and you will look back on all the sadness and joy over the past 18 years and you will keep those memories tucked in a special place in your heart. You feel it will never get any easier, but it will. Slowly, pain-stakingly it will.

And to survive all of this you must do two things...

Say a prayer.

Take a deep breath.

And know that He has heard all of your prayers.

Love, Dena

Just A Simple Prayer

Dear God, Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Please don't let him see his shadow. Amen

Steam Is Coming Out Of My Ears

Normally on Fridays I do the Friday Fill-Ins and I still might later on, but we'll see how things go.

I usually write my posts in the evenings and then set them to automatically post the next morning, which means that normally this would be Thursday evening as I'm writing this. However, it's Friday morning around 2:00am, and I haven't slept yet because I am so angry I could spit nails! I have yelled (alone in a room), I have prayed, I have cried, I have paced.

I'm not going to go into what I'm angry about. Just suffice it to say that these certain someones (yes, more than one person) know better than saying or doing what they did, and they know I have a totally justifiable reason to be angry, and yet, they are upset with me for being angry. Which has me shaking my head.

....ooooooo....I honestly don't remember the last time I was this mad. Seriously.

I am like "I'd like to throw something" kind of mad.


So, my question to all of you is this:

When you are so mad you can't even think straight....When you are beyond complete frustration...When you just want to scream at the top of your lungs.....

What do you do to get it to pass? Other than bopping someone upside the head...which I totally considered.

**********UPDATE****************

Around 2:45am I ended up going into the hot tub where some warm bubbles, soft music on my ipod, and prayer helped enough that I was able to finally relax enough to get some sleep. Only about 3 hours worth, but it's enough for now. Sorry for whining and complaining. Just keepin' it real.

Have a great Friday.

ACK! Send Up The Prayers...QUICK!

The flu is going around our area really badly. I made the unfortunate choice to comment (just last night)about how lucky our family had been, because we haven't had the flu in our house so far at all this year.

This morning I woke Austin up to take a shower before church. He came out and said "Mom, can I go back to bed. I don't feel good and I'm really, really tired". Doesn't sound too severe, right?

That's how several of his basketball team members have started out right before it went into full-fledged flu symtpoms that have lasted a few days.

The reason we are in a panic is that tonight Austin is supposed to be in his Show Choir/Jazz Band show at his school. He really enjoys this and has worked so hard (along with everyone else) to get ready for the show tonight, and it'd be such a shame if he ended up having to miss it.

I am asking for anyone reading this to please take a moment and send up a quick prayer. He can be sick for the next week if he has to be, just not tonight!! :(

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Update: Thanks so much for the prayers here and by email...they appear to be working! Praise God! Austin slept until around lunchtime and while he said he feels better he says he just feels exhausted and still has slight headache. He hasn't eaten much, and has laid on the couch since he got up. I asked what he thought about tonight and he said he is definitely going.